i have 0 dollars 0 cents and i live in a cockroach, beetle, really anything infested hotel in america from the 1800's, cant afford anything cause my chrome os sucks and its chrome os, not a computer, also not mac, so your luckier than me ig
You swine. You vulgar little maggot. You worthless bag of filth. As we say in Texas, you couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions printed on the heel. You are a canker, an open wound. I would rather kiss a lawyer than be seen with you. You took your last vacation in the Islets of Langerhans.
You’re a putrescent mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a cad, and a weasel. I take that back; you are a festering pustule on a weasel’s rump. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, a revulsion, a big suck on a sour lemon.
I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformity. I barf at the very thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut. Lepers avoid you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed, a fungus, the dregs of this earth. You are a technicolor yawn. And did I mention that you smell?
You are a squeaking rat, a mistake of nature and a heavy-metal bagpipe player. You were not born. You were hatched into an unwilling world that rejects the likes of you. You didn’t crawl out of a normal egg, either, but rather a mutant maggot egg rejected by an evil scientist as being below his low standards. Your alleged parents abandoned you at birth and then died of shame in recognition of what they had done to an unsuspecting world. They were a bit late.
Try to edit your responses of unnecessary material before attempting to impress us with your insight. The evidence that you are a nincompoop will still be available to readers, but they will be able to access it ever so much more rapidly. If cluelessness were crude oil, your scalp would be crawling with caribou.
You are a thick-headed trog. I have seen skeet with more sense than you have. You are a few bricks short of a full load, a few cards short of a full deck, a few bytes short of a full core dump, and a few chromosomes short of a full human. Worse than that, you top-post. God created houseflies, cockroaches, maggots, mosquitos, fleas, ticks, slugs, leeches, and intestinal parasites, then he lowered his standards and made you. I take it back; God didn’t make you. You are Satan’s spawn. You are Evil beyond comprehension, half-living in the slough of despair. You are the entropy which will claim us all. You are a green-nostriled, crossed eyed, hairy-livered, goisher kopf, inbred trout-defiler. You make Ebola look good.
You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid, nasty and profane. You are foul and disgusting. You’re a fool, an ignoramus. Monkeys look down on you. Even sheep won’t have sex with you. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in a land that reality forgot. You are not ANSI compliant and your markup doesn’t validate. You have a couple of address lines shorted together. You should be promoted to Engineering Manager.
Do you really expect your delusional and incoherent ramblings to be read? Everyone plonked you long ago. Do you fantasize that your tantrums and conniption fits could possibly be worth the $0.000000001 worth of electricity used to send them? Your life is one big W.O.M.B.A.T., and your future doesn’t look promising either. We need to trace your bloodline and terminate all siblings and cousins in order to cleanse humanity of your polluted genes. The good news is that no normal human would ever mate with you, so we won’t have to go into the sewers in search of your git.
You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a living emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a loathsome disease, a drooling inbred cross-eyed toesucker. You make Quakers shout and strike Pentecostals silent. You have a version 1.0 mind in a version 6.13 world. Your mother had to tie a pork chop around your neck just to get your dog to play with you. You think that www.GuyMacon.com/flame.html is the name of a rock band. You believe that P.D.Q. Bach is the greatest composer who ever lived. You prefer L. Ron Hubbard to Larry Niven and Jerry Pournelle. Hee-Haw is too deep for you. You would watch test patterns all day if the other inmates would let you.
On a good day you’re a half-wit. You remind me of drool. You are deficient in all that lends character. You have the personality of wallpaper. You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted. Spammers look down on you. Phone sex operators hang up on you. Telemarketers refuse to be seen in public with you. You are the source of all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go. May you choke on your own foolish opinions. You are a Pusillanimous galactophage and you wear your sister’s training bra. Don’t bother opening the door when you leave - you should be able to slime your way out underneath. I hope that when you get home your mother runs out from under the porch and bites you.
You smarmy lagerlout git. You bloody woofter sod. Bugger off, pillock. You grotty wanking oik artless base-court apple-john. You clouted boggish foot-licking half-twit. You dankish clack-dish plonker. You gormless crook-pated tosser. You bloody churlish boil-brained clotpole ponce. You craven dewberry pisshead cockup pratting naff. You cockered bum-bailey poofter. You gob-kissing gleeking flap-mouthed coxcomb. You dread-bolted fobbing beef-witted clapper-clawed flirt-gill. You jetere steatopygous pilgarlick hircine whigmaleerious rhadamanthine lintlicker. I refer you to the reply given in the case of Arkell v. Pressdram.
You are so clueless that if you dressed in a clue skin, doused yourself in clue musk, and did the clue dance in the middle of a field of horny clues at the height of clue mating season, you still would not have a clue. If you were a movie you would be a double feature; Battlefield_Earth and Moron_Movies_II. You would be out of focus.
You are a fiend and a sniveling coward, and you have bad breath. You are the unholy spawn of a bandy-legged hobo and a syphilitic camel. You wear strangely mismatched clothing with oddly placed stains. You are degenerate, noxious and depraved. I feel debased just knowing that you exist. I despise everything about you, and I wish you would go away. You are jetsam who dreams of becoming flotsam. You won’t make it. I beg for sweet death to come and remove me from a world which became unbearable when the bioterrorists designed you.
It is hard to believe how incredibly stupid you are. Stupid as a stone that the other stones make fun of. So stupid that you have traveled far beyond stupid as we know it and into a new dimension of stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid cubed. Trans-stupid stupid. Stupid collapsed to a singularity where even the stupons have collapsed into stuponium. Stupid so dense that no intelligence can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing hot summer day on Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one minute than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. It cannot be possible that anything in our universe can really be this stupid. This is a primordial fragment from the original big stupid bang. A pure extract of stupid with absolute stupid purity. Stupid beyond the laws of nature. I must apologize. I can’t go on. This is my epiphany of stupid. After this experience, you may not hear from me for a while. I don’t think that I can summon the strength left to mock your moronic opinions and malformed comments about boring trivia or your other drivel. Duh.
The only thing worse than your logic is your manners. I have snipped away most of your of what you wrote, because, well … it didn’t really say anything. Your attempt at constructing a creative flame was pitiful. I mean, really, stringing together a bunch of insults among a load of babbling was hardly effective… Maybe later in life, after you have learned to read, write, spell, and count, you will have more success. True, these are rudimentary skills that many of us “normal” people take for granted that everyone has an easy time of mastering. But we sometimes forget that there are “challenged” persons in this world who find these things to be difficult. If I had known that this was true in your case then I would have never have exposed myself to what you wrote. It just wouldn’t have been “right.” Sort of like parking in a handicap space. I wish you the best of luck in the emotional, and social struggles that seem to be placing such a demand on you.
I remember when this was how I first knew of this game. Got gifted the game on steam and it's the best game not just of 2022 but one of the best indie platformers of all time.
hey dillweeds trying to use this as a preview for the full game don't no like seriously the full game is so much better i'm still wondering why ptg hasn't made an improved demo to get people to buy the game this leaves a bad (and flatout misleading) impression compared to the full thing and that's really saying something considering how good this game is
going back to this after playing the official release gave me whiplash. you can go soooo much faster in the finished game, and you can also actually get comboes
this game is going to be one of the best games i will ever play (hopefully not foreshadowing) especially because peppino reminds me of a character i made a while back named tommy (except tommy wasnt as cool)
i love the wario land series and this demo managed to capture the feeling and humour of the wario land series while being something totally original.
also you can abuse the taunts by spamming them in midair to slow down, so you might want to do something about that
also, will death be added? i just noticed the lack of death aside from running out of time
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Comments
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i have 2 dollars and 10 cents and am living in a rat infested den somewhere in ancient europe this is all i can afford thanks pizza m
i have 0 dollars 0 cents and i live in a cockroach, beetle, really anything infested hotel in america from the 1800's, cant afford anything cause my chrome os sucks and its chrome os, not a computer, also not mac, so your luckier than me ig
pizza man blessed me with money, i now own
epik lol
how to start game
on keyboard
Show post...
use right arrow then z then go to keybinds while using the arrows and z to change them also the jump keybind is z
Thank you for your help kind sir.
masterpiece
boo
ignore him he just have shit in the balls
bro tried to hate pizza tower :skull:
i got scared
thee comento is so scary i haveth peed my panth
chips ahoyeth landlubbers
You swine. You vulgar little maggot. You worthless bag of filth. As we say in Texas, you couldn't pour water out of a boot with instructions printed on the heel. You are a canker, an open wound. I would rather kiss a lawyer than be seen with you. You took your last vacation in the Islets of Langerhans.
You’re a putrescent mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a cad, and a weasel. I take that back; you are a festering pustule on a weasel’s rump. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, a revulsion, a big suck on a sour lemon.
I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformity. I barf at the very thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut. Lepers avoid you. You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed, a fungus, the dregs of this earth. You are a technicolor yawn. And did I mention that you smell?
You are a squeaking rat, a mistake of nature and a heavy-metal bagpipe player. You were not born. You were hatched into an unwilling world that rejects the likes of you. You didn’t crawl out of a normal egg, either, but rather a mutant maggot egg rejected by an evil scientist as being below his low standards. Your alleged parents abandoned you at birth and then died of shame in recognition of what they had done to an unsuspecting world. They were a bit late.
Try to edit your responses of unnecessary material before attempting to impress us with your insight. The evidence that you are a nincompoop will still be available to readers, but they will be able to access it ever so much more rapidly. If cluelessness were crude oil, your scalp would be crawling with caribou.
You are a thick-headed trog. I have seen skeet with more sense than you have. You are a few bricks short of a full load, a few cards short of a full deck, a few bytes short of a full core dump, and a few chromosomes short of a full human. Worse than that, you top-post. God created houseflies, cockroaches, maggots, mosquitos, fleas, ticks, slugs, leeches, and intestinal parasites, then he lowered his standards and made you. I take it back; God didn’t make you. You are Satan’s spawn. You are Evil beyond comprehension, half-living in the slough of despair. You are the entropy which will claim us all. You are a green-nostriled, crossed eyed, hairy-livered, goisher kopf, inbred trout-defiler. You make Ebola look good.
You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid, nasty and profane. You are foul and disgusting. You’re a fool, an ignoramus. Monkeys look down on you. Even sheep won’t have sex with you. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for attention, and lost in a land that reality forgot. You are not ANSI compliant and your markup doesn’t validate. You have a couple of address lines shorted together. You should be promoted to Engineering Manager.
Do you really expect your delusional and incoherent ramblings to be read? Everyone plonked you long ago. Do you fantasize that your tantrums and conniption fits could possibly be worth the $0.000000001 worth of electricity used to send them? Your life is one big W.O.M.B.A.T., and your future doesn’t look promising either. We need to trace your bloodline and terminate all siblings and cousins in order to cleanse humanity of your polluted genes. The good news is that no normal human would ever mate with you, so we won’t have to go into the sewers in search of your git.
You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a living emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a loathsome disease, a drooling inbred cross-eyed toesucker. You make Quakers shout and strike Pentecostals silent. You have a version 1.0 mind in a version 6.13 world. Your mother had to tie a pork chop around your neck just to get your dog to play with you. You think that www.GuyMacon.com/flame.html is the name of a rock band. You believe that P.D.Q. Bach is the greatest composer who ever lived. You prefer L. Ron Hubbard to Larry Niven and Jerry Pournelle. Hee-Haw is too deep for you. You would watch test patterns all day if the other inmates would let you.
On a good day you’re a half-wit. You remind me of drool. You are deficient in all that lends character. You have the personality of wallpaper. You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted. Spammers look down on you. Phone sex operators hang up on you. Telemarketers refuse to be seen in public with you. You are the source of all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go. May you choke on your own foolish opinions. You are a Pusillanimous galactophage and you wear your sister’s training bra. Don’t bother opening the door when you leave - you should be able to slime your way out underneath. I hope that when you get home your mother runs out from under the porch and bites you.
You smarmy lagerlout git. You bloody woofter sod. Bugger off, pillock. You grotty wanking oik artless base-court apple-john. You clouted boggish foot-licking half-twit. You dankish clack-dish plonker. You gormless crook-pated tosser. You bloody churlish boil-brained clotpole ponce. You craven dewberry pisshead cockup pratting naff. You cockered bum-bailey poofter. You gob-kissing gleeking flap-mouthed coxcomb. You dread-bolted fobbing beef-witted clapper-clawed flirt-gill. You jetere steatopygous pilgarlick hircine whigmaleerious rhadamanthine lintlicker. I refer you to the reply given in the case of Arkell v. Pressdram.
You are so clueless that if you dressed in a clue skin, doused yourself in clue musk, and did the clue dance in the middle of a field of horny clues at the height of clue mating season, you still would not have a clue. If you were a movie you would be a double feature; Battlefield_Earth and Moron_Movies_II. You would be out of focus.
You are a fiend and a sniveling coward, and you have bad breath. You are the unholy spawn of a bandy-legged hobo and a syphilitic camel. You wear strangely mismatched clothing with oddly placed stains. You are degenerate, noxious and depraved. I feel debased just knowing that you exist. I despise everything about you, and I wish you would go away. You are jetsam who dreams of becoming flotsam. You won’t make it. I beg for sweet death to come and remove me from a world which became unbearable when the bioterrorists designed you.
It is hard to believe how incredibly stupid you are. Stupid as a stone that the other stones make fun of. So stupid that you have traveled far beyond stupid as we know it and into a new dimension of stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid cubed. Trans-stupid stupid. Stupid collapsed to a singularity where even the stupons have collapsed into stuponium. Stupid so dense that no intelligence can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing hot summer day on Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one minute than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid. It cannot be possible that anything in our universe can really be this stupid. This is a primordial fragment from the original big stupid bang. A pure extract of stupid with absolute stupid purity. Stupid beyond the laws of nature. I must apologize. I can’t go on. This is my epiphany of stupid. After this experience, you may not hear from me for a while. I don’t think that I can summon the strength left to mock your moronic opinions and malformed comments about boring trivia or your other drivel. Duh.
The only thing worse than your logic is your manners. I have snipped away most of your of what you wrote, because, well … it didn’t really say anything. Your attempt at constructing a creative flame was pitiful. I mean, really, stringing together a bunch of insults among a load of babbling was hardly effective… Maybe later in life, after you have learned to read, write, spell, and count, you will have more success. True, these are rudimentary skills that many of us “normal” people take for granted that everyone has an easy time of mastering. But we sometimes forget that there are “challenged” persons in this world who find these things to be difficult. If I had known that this was true in your case then I would have never have exposed myself to what you wrote. It just wouldn’t have been “right.” Sort of like parking in a handicap space. I wish you the best of luck in the emotional, and social struggles that seem to be placing such a demand on you.
P.S.: You are hypocritical, greedy, violent, malevolent, vengeful, cowardly, deadly, mendacious, meretricious, loathsome, despicable, belligerent, opportunistic, barratrous, contemptible, criminal, fascistic, bigoted, racist, sexist, avaricious, tasteless, idiotic, brain-damaged, imbecilic, insane, arrogant, deceitful, demented, lame, self-righteous, byzantine, conspiratorial, satanic, fraudulent, libelous, bilious, splenetic, spastic, ignorant, clueless, EDLINoid, illegitimate, harmful, destructive, dumb, evasive, double-talking, devious, revisionist, narrow, manipulative, paternalistic, fundamentalist, dogmatic, idolatrous, unethical, cultic, diseased, suppressive, controlling, restrictive, malignant, deceptive, dim, crazy, weird, dyspeptic, stifling, uncaring, plantigrade, grim, unsympathetic, jargon-spouting, censorious, secretive, aggressive, mind-numbing, arassive, poisonous, flagrant, self-destructive, abusive, socially-retarded, puerile, pinguid, and Generally Not Good.
i love pizza tower i wish italy was real
Brain
why did i think this said Britain for a second
ikr :') (I am italian)
frfr
Last video
A video before the end
Pizza of the tower
That moment when
NOOOO MORE GOLF DEMO! (vineboom)
NOOOO MORE HARDOWEEN! (vineboom)
NOOOOOOOO MOOOOOOOORE XMAS BREAAAAAK (VINEBOOM)
late reply but idc.
theres a golf level in the full release. just reminding you.
This game is so cool i wish secrets were real
they are real... just send me your mom's credit card and i'll show you how to find them..
lol
This episode has evil Peppino
i wish pizza was real
your wish has came true
photoshopped
thanks god
New video featuring The Noise
the noice is cool
It would be based if you could do a linux build
you can just use wine
I remember when this was how I first knew of this game. Got gifted the game on steam and it's the best game not just of 2022 but one of the best indie platformers of all time.
too poor to afford the normal game for a few weeks, this radical demo will have to do for now
More Pizza Tower
hey dillweeds trying to use this as a preview for the full game
don't
no like seriously the full game is so much better i'm still wondering why ptg hasn't made an improved demo to get people to buy the game this leaves a bad (and flatout misleading) impression compared to the full thing and that's really saying something considering how good this game is
pizza tower is out on steam!
it's the best thing ever
The next video for the steam version
anybody wanna be a superstar
going back to this after playing the official release gave me whiplash. you can go soooo much faster in the finished game, and you can also actually get comboes
pizza tower
loved it, wish i could get the full game here were i live
Я СКАЧАЛ И НЕ ЗАПУСКАЕТСЯ ЗАПУСКАЕТСЯ ПАПК
скилл ишью
Another video for the steam version
too poor to afford the game lmaoI bought it like, a month ago.
same
I CAN'T AFFORD THE GAME (start a same chain above this comment
same. but the steam game released. and i have no moni. all i have is beta builds of it
pizza tower came out not too long ago
get it...
NOW
for the low low price of 2 toppins
Made a video for the full game
i cant afford piza towrer so im playing tis
same
it be like that
Samuel
828282
PIZZA TOWER IS OUT ON STEAM!
GO PLAY IT!
EVERYONE KNOWS YOU WANT TO!
THE PIZZA GAME IS FINALLY OUT YAAAAY
cant belevie it guys? pizza tower coming in 6 days! Wow! i cant wait! I need to create steam cuz pizza tower!
Show post...
5 days
pizza tower comin out in 9 days
get excited or else
I'M SO FUCKING HYPED
PEPPINO FOR SMASH
(I really hope they do a console release to I actually play the full game)
no, it's on steam
PIZZA TOWER IS COMING OUT IN
19 DAYS!!
if you're not excited for it,
who are you.
i'm going to kill you-
first pizza tower itch.io post of 2023 real??
no beacus im 2nd ><
what
YESSSSS BABE
this game is going to be one of the best games i will ever play (hopefully not foreshadowing) especially because peppino reminds me of a character i made a while back named tommy (except tommy wasnt as cool)
i love the wario land series and this demo managed to capture the feeling and humour of the wario land series while being something totally original.
also you can abuse the taunts by spamming them in midair to slow down, so you might want to do something about that
also, will death be added? i just noticed the lack of death aside from running out of time
it used to have one in a patreon build.
It was ass
It needs to direct me better, cuz i got lost in a level.
Also have the option to chamge controls
there is a option to change controls just go to options in the title screen.
thx
How tf do i click "Start game"?
This has no indication of what buttons to press even starting it!